不要在你的邮件中用这些词

原文链接： http://www.linkedin.com/pulse/article/20141208072941-64875646-stop-using-these-words-in-your-emails?trk=tod-home-art-list-large_0

你知道你在Email里是什么样子的吗？

在邮件里，你不能听到对方的声音，不能看到对方的脸，所以你就无法知道邮件的对方对你的邮件有什么样的反应。表情符号和惊叹号只能把你带的原来越远（特别是在正式邮件中）。并且，事实上，有的时候正式的邮件在内容没有开始之前就会让人感觉很差劲。

关于神秘邮件的华尔街时报的一篇文章讲了一个故事：一个顾问用邮件发了一篇详细的项目计划给她的客户，但是只收到了一个极其简短的回复：“收到”。

她很担心她的客户是不是生气或者失望了，其实这个客户当时因为能把这个问题用这么小的工作量就能解决感到而极为兴奋。

所以，你怎么能确保你的邮件信息在没有任何负面的地方的时候传送给对方？

着重使用正面的语言

整体上来说，用词的选择决定了你的对话的语气好坏。当你持续的选择负面的词语，你的邮件就会显得你毫不客气，傲慢或者气愤。

负面的词语永远不是好事，同时还会创造一个负面的气氛。即使你对某件事觉得很负面，你也可以尝试用正面的语气去发送这封邮件，同时你通常也会得到更好的回复。

像“不能”，“损坏”，“不要”，“错误”，“失败”，“无法”，“没有价值”，“损失”，“错误”，“不”，“问题”，“拒绝”，“停止”，“无法做到”，“不幸的是”，“极限”，“紧急”，“永远不”，“无力”和“情况不佳”，这些词都有很负面的含义。

拿下面的语句做一个例子：

不幸的是，因为某些人的原因，这个项目现在无法按时完成了。

在这句话中包含很多负面词语。但是，你可以很简单的把同样的信息说的更正面一点，像这样：

每个人都必须把在周四之前提交工作，这样子我们就可以按时完成项目。

你可以看到，使用不同的文字完全可以改变你的语气。如果上面例子中的华尔街时报的老板用“谢谢你！”来代替“收到”，他的员工或许就不会担心她是否成功完成了工作。

在写邮件的时候，尽量用一些更正面的词语，像“获益”，“最好这么做”，“解决问题”， "重要的问题"，“发展”，“成功”和“有价值”。

要做和不要做的事

陷入负面陷阱的最简单的方式就是在刚开始就列出别人不应该做的事情。不要把未吃完的食物留在公司的冰箱里。不要开会迟到。是指“不要忘记”都要比“要记得”更加负面。

与其告诉别人不要做什么，尝试告诉他们应该做什么。请把你的午餐在下班的时候带回家。开会请提前五分钟到。

人们更喜欢遵从一个正面的，积极的对他们行为的要求，而不是一个负面的抱怨。

如果存在疑问，那就说出来

如果你觉得人们经常误解你的邮件，你可能需要更直接一点。在和你的同事交流的时候，告诉你的同事你的想法是没有任何坏处的，尤其是那些和你很友好的朋友。

例如，在关于项目时间表的邮件中，与其因为你不习惯用会议安排的软件，而使用尖锐的负面语句，你可以这么说：“这个会议安排软件很难用，但是让我们在这周五开会…”

这样的话，收件人就会理解你是对别的事情感觉不爽，而不是对他们。

原文：

Do you know how you sound in emails?

Without the benefit of being able to hear people’s vocal inflections or see their faces, it can be challenging to interpret how the person on the other end of an email is feeling. Emoticons and exclamation points can only take you so far (especially in a business email), and in fact, sometimes formal business language can start to sound, well, negative without context.

A Wall Street Journal article on enigmatic email tells the story of a consultant who sent a detailed project plan to her client by email and received only a one-word response: “Noted."

She feared he was angry or disappointed, when in fact, he was thrilled to be able to clear the issue from his inbox with so little effort.

So how can you ensure you get your message across without seeming negative?

Accentuate the positive.

Overall, the word choices you make add up to the tone of your communications. And when you consistently choose negative words and phrases, your emails will sound terse, condescending, or angry.

Negativity is never good and always sends out negative vibes. Even if you feel negative about a situation, you can still make an effort to turn your emails into more positive messages — which usually get better responses.

Words like cannot, damage, do not, error, fail, impossible, little value, loss, mistake, not, problem, refuse, stop, unable to, unfortunately, escalation, urgent, never, inability and unsound all have a strong negative connotation.

Take this sentence for example:

Unfortunately, it will be impossible to finish the project on time because of the problems some people are causing.

That’s a lot of negative words for one sentence. But you could easily convey the same information in a more positive way, like this:

Everyone must turn in their portion of the project by Thursday so that we can complete the work on time.

As you can see, it’s all about the words you choose that conveys your tone. If the boss in the Wall Street Journal example above had even responded with, “Thank you!” instead of “Noted,” his employee probably would not have worried whether she had done a good job.

Try to phrase your message using more positive terms like benefit, it is best to, issue, matter, progress, success and valuable.

Dos and Don’ts

An easy way to fall into the negativity trap is to start listing out things people shouldn’t do. Don’t leave uneaten food in the office refrigerator. Don’t be late to the meeting. Even saying “don’t forget” is more negative than saying “remember.”

Instead of telling others what not to do, try telling them what they should do instead. Please take your lunches home at the end of the day. Please arrive for the meeting five minutes early.

People are much more likely to comply with a positive request than a negative complaint on their behavior.

When in doubt, spell it out.

If you find that people frequently misinterpret your emails, you might need to be more explicit. There’s no harm in actually saying how you feel when communicating with colleagues, especially those with whom you have a good relationship.

For example, rather than using terse, negative language in an email about project scheduling because you’re sick of the software you have to use to schedule meetings, you might come out and say, “This scheduling system is frustrating to me, but it looks like we can meet on Friday…”

That way, the recipient can understand that you’re feeling negative about somethingother than him.