给电脑软件维修员一封纠结的信

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Dear Tech Support:

Last year I upgraded from Boyfriend 5.0 to Husband 1.0 and noticed a distinct slow down in overall system performance, particularly in the flower and jewelry applications, which operated flawlessly under Boyfriend 5.0.

In addition, Husband 1.0 uninstalled many other valuable programs, such as Romance 9.5 and Personal Attention 6.5 and then installed undesirable programs such as NBA 5.0, NFL 3.0 and Golf Clubs 4.1.

Conversation 8.0 no longer runs, and Housecleaning 2.6 simply crashes the system. I've tried running Nagging 5.3 to fix these problems, but to no avail.

What can I do?

Signed,

Desperate

DEAR DESPERATE:

First, keep in mind Boyfriend 5.0 is an entertainment Package, while Husband 1.0 is an operating system.

Please enter command: ithoughtyoulovedme.html and try to download Tears 6.2 and don't forget to install the Guilt 3.0 update. If that application works as designed, Husband 1.0 should then automatically run the applications Jewelry 2.0 and Flowers 3.5.

But remember, overuse of the above application can cause Husband 1.0 to default to Grumpy Silence 2.5, Happy Hour 7.0 or Beer 6.1. Please note that Beer 6.1 is a very bad program that will download the Snoring Loudly Beta.

Whatever you do, DO NOT install Mother-In-Law 1.0 (it runs a virus in the background that will eventually seize control of all your system resources.)

Also do not attempt to reinstall Boyfriend 5.0 program. These are unsupported applications and will crash Husband 1.0.

In summary, Husband 1.0 is a great program, but it does have limited memory and cannot learn new applications quickly. You might consider buying additional software to improve memory and performance. We recommend Cooking 3.0 and Hot Lingerie 7.7.

Good Luck,

Tech Support

 

亲爱的电脑维修员:

 

去年,我把男朋友软件5.0上升为老公软件1.0,发现整个系统运转明显下降,特别是鲜花和首饰两部功能。他们在男朋友5.0版绝无任何问题。

 

更甚者,老公软件1.0不能安装很多有价值的系统,比如浪漫蒂克9.5版,在乎在意6.5版。然而老公软件1.0却安装了一些很不期望的功能,比如国家篮球5.0,国家足球3.0,高尔夫俱乐部4.1。

 

交流8.0不再有效,清理房间系统全部崩溃,我试着用恐吓5.3解决这些问题,全军覆灭。

 

我怎么办?

绝望

 

亲爱的绝望:

 

首先要记住,男朋友软件5.0是娱乐包装,而老公软件10是务实软件。

来,输入“我想你爱我”网址,下载眼泪6.2。哦,别忘记提高罪恶感到3.0版。如果他们运行正常,老公软件1.0会自动回复鲜花和首饰功能。

 

然而,请记住,过分使用鲜花和首饰功能会导致老公软件1.0启动郁闷2.5,快乐时光7.0 (快乐时光即 HAPPY HOUR,指美国酒吧晚7点或6点前可以点便宜的酒水和小菜),啤酒6.1。警告你,啤酒6.1的劣根性会带来雷雨般的酣声。

 

无论如何不要安装婆婆岳母1.0,二者所带病毒将控制整个软件。

 

还要记住,不可以再安装原来的男朋友5.0。他不仅不支持老公1.0,而且会摧毁老公1.0。

 

简言之,老公1.0是非常好的软件,但他记忆硬盘有限,同时对新事物反映不快,你最好买一个附加软件扩大老公1.0的记忆和反映。我们强烈建议你增添厨艺3.0和性感内衣7.7。

 

祝你好运。

 

软件技术维修员

 

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感觉挺有意思,转载于;新浪上雪

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转载于:https://www.cnblogs.com/newway/archive/2012/07/18/2597574.html

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