Today, while buying groceries, I noticed that the lady in front of me had left a box behind. I grabbed the box and ran out the door after her. After turning around to find three employees chasing me, I noticed I had just stolen the donation box. FML
今天结结实实的当了一回贼，商店正排队呢，我突然发觉在我前面排队的女士有个箱子“忘记”带了，楼主没多想，抓起箱子就冲出去追人，同时。。。。店里的三名员工对我穷追不舍，然后让我站住，楼主低头一看，妈呀，怎么是个募捐箱。 FML
Today, my four year old daughter came up to me with her finger in her ear. She then let me know that her earwax tasted better than the dinner I made. In front of my whole family. FML
刚刚就在刚刚，我四岁的女儿一边掏着耳朵一边走到我跟前，然后当着我的面添了一下耳屎，告诉我我做的晚餐还不如她的耳屎好吃。。。 FML
Today, a little girl locked all the stalls in the girls' bathroom where I work and crawled under the doors. I then had to crawl around on the bathroom floor in order to unlock the doors. FML
真是见了鬼了，你永远不会知道一个小女孩儿会干什么，今天有个小女孩儿，把我工作地点的盥洗间的门都从里面反锁了，因为盥洗间的门跟地板是有一块距离的，所以她反锁之后就从那里爬出来了， ，现在轮到我爬进去开门。FML
Today, while at the mall, a lady dropped her credit card while in line to buy something. I came over, picked it up and gave it to her just for her to shove it in my hand and scream, "She's stealing my wallet! My wallet!" The police came. FML
今天，在购物中心的时候，一位女士在排队买东西的时候，掉下了她的信用卡。我走过去，把它捡起来，交给她，然而却把它塞进我的手里，尖叫道:“她在偷我的钱包！”我的钱包!“然后警察把我带走了。
Today, my family went out to dinner at a seafood restaurant. While we were eating our food, my grandma demanded to see the manager, and loudly complained that her fish was "too fishy". FML
去海鲜餐厅吃饭，我奶奶非要跟人家经理投诉，结果人来了，她说你们做的鱼实在是“鱼味太大了”（您老是想说腥吧？）。
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