Six Secrets of High-Energy People

    There's an energy crisis in America, and it has nothing to do with fossil fuels. Millions of us get up each moring already weary over what the day holds. "I just can't get started," people say. But it's not physical energy that most of us lack. Sure, we could all use extra sleep and a better diet. But in truth, people are healthier today than at any time in history. I can almost guarantee that if you long more energy, the problem is not with your body.

    What you're seeking is not physical energy. It's emotional energy. Yet,sad to say, life sometimes seems designed to exhaust our supply. We have family obligations. We encounter emergencies and personal crises. No wonder so many of us suffer from emtional faitgue, a kind of utter exhaustion of the spirit.

    And yet we all know people who are filled with joy, despite the unpleasant circumatances of their lives. Even as a child, I observed people who were poor, or disabled, or ill, but who nonetheless faced life with optimism and vigor, Consider Laura Hillenbrand, who, depite an extremely week body, wrote the best-seller Seabiscuit. Hillenbrand barely had enough physical energy to dray herself out of bed to write. But she was fueled by having a story she wanted to share. It was emtional energy that helped her succeed.      Unlikely physical energy, which is finite and diminishes with age, emtional energy is unlimited and has nothing to do with genes or upbringing. So how do you get it? You can't simply tell yourself to be positive. You must take ation. Here are six practical strategies that work.

 

1.Do something new.

    Very little that's new occurs in our lives. The impact of this sameness on our emotional enery is gradual, but huge: It's like a tire with a slow leak. You don't notic it at first, but eventually you'll get a flat. It's up to you to plug the leak-even though there are always a dozen reasons to say stuck in your dull routnes of life. That's where Maura, 36, a waitress, found herself a year ago.        Fortunately, Maura had a lifeline-a group of women friends who meet regularly to discuss their livs. Their lively discussions spurred Maura to make small but nevertheless life-altering changes. She joined a gym in the next town. She changed her look with a short haircut and new black T-shirts. Eventually, Maura gathered the courage to quit her job and start her own business.

     Here's a challenge: If it's something you wouldn't ordinarily do, do it. Try a dish you've never eaten. Listen to music you'd ordinarily true out. You'll discover these small things add to your emotional energy.

2.Reclaim life's meaning.

    So many of my patients tell me that their lives used to have meaning, but that somewhere along the line things went state.

    The first step in solving this meaning shortage is to figure out what you really care about, and then do something about it. A case in point is Ivy, 57, a pioneer in investment banking. "I mistakenly believed that all the mony I made would mean something," she says. "But I feel lost, like a 22-year-old wondering what to do with her life." Ivy's solution? She started a program that shows Wall Streeters how to donate time and money to poor children. In the process, Ivy filled her life with meaning.

3.Put yourself in the fun zone.

    Most of us grown-ups are seriously fun-deprived. High-energy people have the same day-to-day workk ad the rest of us, but they manage to find something enjoyable in every situation. A real-estate broker I know keeps herself amused on the job by mentally redecorating the houses she shows to  clients. "I love imagining what even the most run-down house could look like with a little tender loving care." she says. "It's a challenge and the least desirable properties are usually the most fun."

    We all define fun differently, of course, but I can guarantee this: If you put just a bit of it into your day, your energy will increase quickly.

4.Bid farewell to guilt and regret.

    Everyone's past is filled with regrets that still cause pain. But from an emtional energy point of view, they are dead weights that keeo us from moving forward. While they can't merely be willed away, I do recommend you remind yoursef that whatever happened is in the past, and nothing can change that. Hloding on to the memory only allows the damage to continue into the present.

5.Make up your mind.

    Say you've been thinking about cutting your hair short. Will it look stylish or too extreme? You endlessly think it over. Having the decision hanging over your head is a huge energy drain. Every time you can't decide, you burden yourself with altermatives. Quit thinking that you have to make the right decision; instead, make a choice and don't look back.

6.Give to get.

   Emotional energy has a kind of magical quality: The more you give, the more you get back. This is the difference between emotional and physical energy. With the latter, you have to get it to be able to give it. With the former, however, you get it by giving it.

   Start by asking everyone you meet, "How are you?" as if you really want to know, them listen to the reply. Be the one who hears. Most of us also need to smile more often. If you don't smile at the person you love first thing in the morning, you're sucking enery out of your relationship. Finally, help another person and make the help real, concrete. Give a massage to someone you love, or cook her dinner. Then, expand the circle to work. Try asking yourself what you'd do if your goal were to be helpful rather than efficient.

    After all, if it's true that what goes around comes around, why not make sure that what's circulating around you is the good stuff?