托福英语写作22范文

范文如上所示，亮点：

1. Indisputable 毋庸置疑的
2. pivotal 中枢的，极为重要的，可以替换成center
3. manifest,相当于show，更偏向于证明
   我的改进文章：

In modern society, the phenomenon that all people, regardless of their status or ages, are more intended to get involved with the social incidents, especially political events. People should care about the events and news happened around themselves, which is undisputable important for the development of the society. However, when it comes to the topic whether students should be told\ the view and comments from teachers, opinions vary from person to person. In my perspective, opinions of teachers should not be shared in a class.

Admittedly, it is of great significance for youngsters to get to know what happens in their society and country, which would contribute to the establishment of their sense of responsibility and liberty. However, it should be the task for off-school time, the school is a place for studying knowledge, though. Students, in my opinion, have a variety of backgrounds, sometimes they might be harmed because of the comments from teachers. For instance, assume that has been a striking, and the teacher addresses some doubts on it, then some students who come from the family of the workers might be hurt unconsciously. So the teacher should not be referring to something irrelevant of the class, if so, please try not to make your own comments.

For another thing, students are sometimes too young to distinguish the pivotal matter in some social events, so the viewpoint of the teacher might deeply influence theirs. It sometimes do harm to a student who is building his view of value and the world. Students should be acquainted with the whole background of the event, and then they can make their viewpoint on their own. It is a freedom to have their own opinions. Also, some students might be really aggressive and energetic, sometimes they will do something under impulsion, which is definitely not the goal of our education.
Students are likely to have the eager to do some things for the political or social events, and their passion need to be guided and controled by the teachers to avoid influencing their study. It is our duty to build a bright future for the students, not only raise the sense of their liberty and responsibility, but also protect them until they are grown enough to deal with the twists and sorrows in their life.

All in all, the students should not be told their teacher’s opinion for some social events. And we need to reduce the discussion in the class, and protect them as hard as we can, to build a brighter tomorrow, not only for us, but for the children.