You Acitons Speak Louder

article:
Your actions speak louder
A peace corps staff member is hurriedly called to a town in Ethiopia to deal with reports that one of the volunteers is treating Ethiopians like dogs.What could the volunteer be doing to communicate that?
A volunteer in Nigeria has great trouble getting any discipline in his class,and it is known that the students have no respect for him because he has shown no self-respect.How has he shown that?
Neither volunteer offended his hosts with words.But both of them were unaware of what they had communicate through their nonverbal behavior.
In the first case,the volunteer working at a health center would go into the waiting room and call for the next patient.she did this as she would in America-by pointing with her finger to the next patient and beckoning him to come.Acceptable in the States,but in Ethiopia her pointing gesture is for children and her beckoning signal for dogs.In Ethiopia one points to a person by extending the arm and hand and beckons by holding the hand out,palm down,and closing it repeatedly.
In the second case,the volunteer insisted that students look him in the eye to show attentiveness,in a country where prolonged eye contact is considered disrespectful.
While the most innocent American-English gesture may have insulting,embarrassing,or at least confusing connotations in another culture,the converse is also true.If foreign visitors were to bang on the table and hiss at the waiter for service in a New York restaurant they would be fortunate if they were only thrown out .Americans might find foreign students overly polite if they bow.
It seems easier to accept the arbitrariness of language -the dog is chien in French or aja in Yoruba-than the differences in the emotionally laden behavior of nonverbal communication ,which in mangy ways is just as arbitrary as language.
We assume that our way of talking and gesturing is natural and those who do things differently are somehow playing with nature.this assumption leads to a blindness about intercultural behavior.And individuals are likely to remain blind and unaware of what they are communicating nonverbally,because the hosts will seldom tell them that they have committed a social blunder.It is rude to tell people they are rude;thus the hosts grant visitors a foreigner’s license,allowing them to make mistakes of social etiquette,and they never know until too late which ones prove disastrous.
An additional handicap is that the visitors have not entered the new setting as free agents,able to detect and adopt new ways of communicating without words.they are prisoners of their own culture and interact within their own framework.Yet the fact remains that for maximum understanding the visitor using the words of another language also must learn to use the tools of nonverbal communication of that culture.
Nonverbal communication -teaching it and measuring effect-is more difficult than formal language instruction.But now that language has achieve its proper recognition as being essential for success,the area of nonverbal behavior should be taught to people who will live in another country in a systematic way,giving them actual experiences,awareness,sensitivity.Indeed,it is the rise in linguistic fluency which now makes nonverbal fluency even more critical.A linguistically fluent visitor may tend to offend even more than whose who don’t speak as well if that visitor shows ignorance about interface etiquette;the national may perceive this disparity between linguistic and nonlinguistic performance as a disregard for the more subtle aspects of intercultural communication.Because nonverbal cues reflect emotional stages,both visitor and host national might not be able to articulate what’s going on.
While ti would be difficult to map out all the nonverbal details for every language that Peace Corps teaches ,one can hope to make visitors aware of the existence and emotional importance of nonverbal channels.I have identified five such channels:kinesics,proxemics,chronemics,oculesics and haptics.
Kinesics-movements of the body(head,mars,legs).The initial example from the health center in Ethiopia was a problem caused by a kinesic sign being used which had different meaning cross-culturally .Another example,the American gesture of slitting one’s throat implying “I’ve had it ”or”I’m in trouble”conveys quite a different message in Swaziland.It means “I love you”
Americans make no distinction between gesturing for silence to an adult or to a child.An American will put one finger to the lips for both,while an Ethiopian will use only one finger to a child and four fingers for an adult.To use only one finger for an adult is disrespectful.On the other hand,Ethiopians make no distinction in gesturing to indicate emphatic negation.They shake their index finger from side to side to an adult as well as to a child,whereas this gesture is used only for children by Americans.Thus ,if visitors are not conscious of the meaning of such behavior,they not only will offend their hosts but they will be offended by them.
Drawing in the cheeks and holding the arms rigidly by the side of the body mean ”thin”in Amharic.Diet-conscious Americans feel complimented if they are told that they are slim and so may naturally assume that to tell an Ethiopian friend this is also complimentary.Yet in Ethiopia and a number of other countries,this is taken pejoratively,as it is thought better to be heavyset,indicating health and status and enough wealth to ensure the two.
Proxemics-the use of interpersonal space.South Americans,Greeks,and others find comfort in standing,sitting or taking to people at a distance,which Americans find intolerably close;we give their unusual closeness the social interpretation of aggressiveness and intimacy,causing us to have feelings of hostility,discomfort,or intimidation.If we back away to our greater distance of comfort,we are perceived as being cold,unfriendly,and distrustful .Somalis would see us as we see South Americans,since their interface distance is greater still than ours.
Chronemics-the timing of verbal exchanges during conversation.As Americans we expect our partner to respond to our statement immediately .I some other cultures,people time their exchanges to leave silence between each statement.For Americans this silence is unsettling.To use it may mean that the person is shy,inattentive,bored or nervous.It causes us to repeat,paraphrase,talk louder,and correct our speech to accommodate our partner.Int intercultural situation,it might be best for the visitor to tolerate the silence and wait for a response.
Oculesics- eye-to-eye contact or avoidance .Americans are dependant upon eye contact as a sign of listening behavior.we do not feel that there is human contact without eye contact.In many countries there are elaborate patterns of eye avoidance which we regard as inappropriate.
Haptics-the tactile form of communication .where ,how,and how often people can touch each other while conversing are culturally defined patterns.we need not go beyond the borders of out own country to see groups which touch each other more often that Anglo-Americans do.Overseas often feel crowded and pushed around by people who have much higher toleration for public physical contact and even need it as part of their communication process.A visitor may feel embarrassed when a host national friend continues to hold his or her hand long after the formal greeting are over.
There five channels of nonverbal communication exist in every culture.The patterns and forms are completely arbitrary,and it is arguable as to what is universal and what is culturally defined.
Of course,there is no guarantee that heightened awareness will change behavior,Indeed,there may be situations where visitors should not alter their behavior,depending on the status,personalities,and values in the social context,but the approach seeks to make people aware of an area of interpersonal activity which for too long has been left to chance or to the assumption that visitors to other countries will be sensitive to it because they are surrounded by it.

translation:
你的行动更有说服力
一名和平队的工作人员被紧急叫来埃塞俄比亚的一个城镇，处理一名志愿者对待埃塞俄比亚人像狗一样的报道。志愿者能做些什么来传达这一点？
尼日利亚的一名志愿者在课堂上很难遵守纪律，大家都知道，学生们不尊重他，因为他没有表现出自尊。他是怎么表现出来的？
两位志愿者都没有用言语冒犯主人，但他们都不知道自己通过非言语行为进行了什么交流。
在第一种情况下，在健康中心工作的志愿者会进入候诊室，呼叫下一个病人。她这样做就像在美国一样，用手指指着下一个病人，并示意他来。在美国是可以接受的，但在埃塞俄比亚，她的指点手势是给孩子们用的，她的招手手势是给狗用的，在埃塞俄比亚，有人伸出胳膊和手来指点一个人，然后伸出手来，手掌向下，反复地合上。
在第二个案例中，志愿者坚持让学生们直视他的眼睛来表现出专注，在这个国家，长时间的眼神交流被认为是不礼貌的。
虽然在另一种文化中，最纯真的美式英语手势可能有侮辱、尴尬或至少是令人困惑的含义，但反过来也一样。如果外国游客在纽约的一家餐馆用餐时砰砰地一声敲桌子，并向服务员嘘声，如果他们只是被赶出去，他们将是幸运的。美国人可能会发现外国的学生鞠躬时过于礼貌。
人们似乎更容易接受语言的任意性——狗在法语中是chien，在约鲁巴是aja，而不是在非语言交流中充满情感的行为上的差异，这种差异在很多方面和语言一样具有任意性。
我们认为我们说话和打手势的方式是自然的，而那些做不同事情的人在某种程度上是在玩弄自然。这种假设导致了对跨文化行为的盲目性。个人很可能仍然是盲目的，不知道他们在用非语言交流什么，因为东道主很少告诉他们他们犯了社交错误，告诉别人他们很粗鲁是不礼貌的，因此东道主给来访者颁发了外国人的执照，允许他们在社交礼仪上犯错误，他们永远不会知道哪一个是灾难性的，直到太晚。
另一个障碍是参观者没有作为自由人进入新的环境，他们能够发现并采用新的无词交流方式。他们是自己文化的囚徒，在自己的框架内相互交流。然而，事实上，为了最大限度地理解访问者，使用另一种语言的词汇也必须学会使用非语言交际工具。
非言语交际-传授和衡量非言语交际的效果比正式的语言教学要困难得多。但是现在人们已经认识到语言是成功的关键，非言语行为领域应该系统地传授给那些将要在另一个国家生活的人，给他们实际的经验、意识，敏感度。事实上，正是语言流畅度的提高使得非语言流畅性变得更加重要。如果一个语言流利的访客对界面礼仪表现出无知，那么他可能会比那些不太会说话的访客更容易得罪人；国民可能认为语言和非语言表现之间的差异忽视了跨文化交际中更微妙的方面，因为非语言暗示反映了情感阶段，所以来访者和东道国都可能无法清楚地表达发生了什么。
虽然TI很难为和平队所教的每一种语言找出所有的非语言细节，但是人们可以希望让访问者意识到非语言渠道的存在和情感重要性。我已经确定了五个这样的渠道：运动、代词、计时、眼动和触觉。
身体的运动（头部、火星、腿部）。埃塞俄比亚健康中心的最初例子是，由于使用了一种具有不同跨文化含义的运动符号而引起的问题。另一个例子是，美国人割喉表示“我已经有了它”或“我有麻烦了”，传达了完全不同的信息在斯威士兰，意思是“我爱你”
美国人对大人和小孩的手势不作区别。美国人对两个人都用一个手指抵住嘴唇，而埃塞俄比亚人对小孩只用一个手指，对大人只用四个手指。对大人只用一个手指是不礼貌的。另一方面，埃塞俄比亚人在手势上不加区别地表示强调否定。他们对成年人和儿童左右摇晃食指，而美国人只对儿童使用这种手势。因此，如果游客不知道这种行为的含义，他们不仅会得罪主人，还会被主人得罪。
在阿姆哈拉语中，画面颊和紧握手臂意味着“瘦”。有饮食意识的美国人如果被告知自己很苗条，就会感到受到称赞，因此自然会认为告诉埃塞俄比亚朋友这也是一种赞美。然而，在埃塞俄比亚和其他一些国家，这是轻蔑的，因为它是被认为最好是体重，表明健康和地位和足够的财富，以确保两者。
Proxemics：人际空间的使用。南美洲、希腊人和其他人在站着、坐着或与远处的人交往时感到舒适，而美国人则觉得这种距离太近，令人难以忍受；我们给他们不寻常的亲密关系以攻击性和亲密的社会解释，使我们产生敌意、不适或恐吓的感觉。如果我们后退在我们更大的舒适距离之外，我们被认为是冷漠、不友好和不信任的。索马里人会像我们看到南美洲人一样看到我们，因为他们的接触距离比我们还要远。
时间决定了谈话中言语交流的时机。正如美国人所期望的那样，我们的伴侣会立即对我们的陈述做出回应。在其他一些文化中，人们会在每次谈话之间保持沉默。对美国人来说，这种沉默是令人不安的。使用这种沉默可能意味着对方害羞、注意力不集中、无聊或紧张。它会导致在跨文化的情况下，最好让来访者容忍沉默，等待回应。
眼科学-眼对眼接触或回避。美国人依赖眼接触作为倾听行为的标志。我们不认为没有眼接触就有人接触。在许多国家，有复杂的眼回避模式，我们认为这是不适当的。
触觉交流的触觉形式。在哪里，如何，在文化上，人们在交谈的时候能够接触对方的频率是有定义的。我们不必越过自己国家的边界去看那些比英美国家更经常接触对方的群体。在海外，人们常常感到拥挤，被那些对公共身体接触有更高容忍度甚至需要的人挤在一起作为他们交流过程的一部分，当一位东道主国家的朋友在正式的问候结束后很长一段时间仍握着他的手时，来访者可能会感到尴尬。
在每种文化中都存在着五种非语言交际的渠道，这种模式和形式是完全任意的，关于什么是普遍的和什么是文化上的定义是有争议的。
当然，并不能保证提高的意识会改变行为，事实上，有些情况下访客不应该改变他们的行为，这取决于社会环境中的地位、个性和价值观，但是，这种方法试图让人们意识到一个人际活动领域，这个领域长期以来一直被留给机会，或者假设到其他国家的游客会对它敏感，因为他们被它所包围。