write in the night

To my surprise, my grieve is already longer than my happiness. Since we knew each other, we got together, then we departed. we've been together for 3 years, but we got more than 3 years distance. Every day, in these three years, every day, i miss you desperately, i think you did so as well.

Since the feeling, the condition is so hard for me, i keep telling myself giving up, i will gradually stop painning. Things are not getting better now, every single day, i keep questioning myself. I can not help to yell out "i miss you, truely miss you!" I am not share problems with my friends anymore, i knew that is not helpful, instead this is a huge mistake i've been made. You don't need to talk with others, all that will enlarge you problem and make it even more difficult to handle.

I can not deny i still love you.Your words, you motion, you response, you facial expression, they are all in my mind. I miss you more every day, but what can i do for that? Except bury all the feelings inside, when i go to bed, all the picture pop into my head, i cry, cry, until it tired me enough, i will fall asleep.

This is the way i chose, this is the love i chose, this is the life-style i chose, who can i blame for? Do not expect pefect love, for these who haven't got that you blessed with luck, for the person who have got that-you can never fall in love again. How pathetic! How lucky we can be average person, the average people never pursue the superior.

Release, release my feeling, release my anxieties, release you from my mind. I want to be a happy person, i don't want to be the way i possessed now, i don't like the deep-thoughted myself, i just want to be a simple being. The love, the miss, the confusion really torture me, they can knock me down.

Help, Help, desperately...