[朱总]My Inferiority Complex

  I felt inferiority when I was a children. I always considered that I was an idiot. But after a period of time I found out a rule. On one hand if I contrasted myself with the man who more crackajack than me I might feel inferiority. On the other hand if I contrasted with the man who weaker than me I might feel confident. Human beings search for the balance all the time whether he is a son of heaven or a beggar. Possessing of the balance is a kind of ability or knowledge. When you feel inferiority you should adjust yourself to the state which can make you feel confident so that you may feel much less painful. Suppose that you do not possess such ability. You may relapse into desperation and you even may give up yourself at last. Someone has told me that inferiority complex and amour-propre are the same feelings. I think it is right. Finally I want to say that the inferiority complex bring me into “success”.
       I was weak when I was born. My mother did not have enough alimentation when she was pregnancy. But another boy who was born in the same year as me was much stronger. So that people called him Fubsy-Chen. Of course I considered him as my idol. In the shade of Fubsy-Chen I always felt inferiority and I looked like a small geezer when I was only 20 years old. There even were five furrows on my forehead. And I called it staff.
Fubsy-Chen not only looked fat but also was clever. When I did not manage to read number but he could write down it .when I did not know what was poem but he could recite it. He always was ahead of me. So he was considered as a wonder child in my hometown and I was considered as an idiot. Due to they always called me idiot, at last I also considered myself as a idiot.
       As a result, I did not like playing with Fubsy-Chen because I felt inferiority and People always contrasted he with me. During a period of time I thought I was stupid, craven and coy. And Some times I might deceive others to satisfy my amour-propre.
Another reason which made me felt inferiority was that I was poor. My clothing, shoes and schoolbag were abandoned by my eldership.
       In the elementary school, there were two teachers loved me and encouraged me. One was Li Qing-lin and the other was Hu Jing-quan . I have never forgotten them. Mr. Hu had told me that “知耻而后勇”, and translated it to me. After that I decided to study hard and created an inequable life.
       I felt hard during the high school. Due to my hard study I beat Fubsy-Chen. I felt pride at that time. You might think I was infantilityed but I thought it a great success.
       In the senior high school I become more mature. And I could adjust my feelings and emotion . when I got a good achievement. I contrasted myself with the students who more successful than me. If I faced difficulty I might contrast myself with others who received more suffering.
       Everyone may have inferiority complex. But it has both good and bad influence. How do you face up to it?
       Beating ourselves is so difficile, because you may be beclouded by yourself and can not make out the right choice.
       My dear friends, please maintaining yourself from now on.