让你不在害怕指针_害怕并决定不害怕

让你不在害怕指针

I told this story at the Insites Xmas Special earlier this month and have been meaning to write it all up. It’s the story of how I stopped being afraid of airplanes. In the hope that something in this is of use to anyone else who is scared of something and wants to deal with it.

我在本月初的Insites Xmas Special上讲了这个故事，并且一直打算把它全部写下来。 这是我如何不再害怕飞机的故事。 希望其中的某些内容对那些害怕并想要处理的人有用。

I wasn’t always scared of planes.

我并不总是害怕飞机。

My parents emigrated to the USA when I was 15 and, as a student I flew out to visit them three times. I wouldn’t say I was a great fan of being cramped in a pressurized tube for 8 hours, but I wasn’t scared.

我的父母15岁时移居美国 ，作为一名学生，我飞赴了3次。 我不会说我非常喜欢在加压管中抽筋8个小时，但我并不感到害怕。

I wasn’t scared of much aged 20.

我并不害怕20岁。

After stopping dancing I worked backstage in the theatre, cheerfully flinging myself under bits of fast moving scenery and making sure that I was seen to be as brave and as competent at my job as any boy.

停止跳舞后，我在剧院的后台工作，高高兴兴地跳入一片快速变化的风景中，并确保自己像任何一个男孩一样勇敢，胜任。

Then I became pregnant. When my daughter was born I became afraid of everything. Suddenly the world looked like this terrifying place, where everything and everyone was out to hurt this baby that I had been entrusted with. This fear was a symptom of post natal depression and in time I returned to feeling pretty much like myself again. A bit less crazy, a bit less happy to take risks but not utterly terrified of the world.

然后我怀孕了。 我女儿出生时，我变得害怕一切。 突然，这个世界看起来像一个可怕的地方，在那里所有人和所有人都在伤害我受托的这个婴儿。 这种恐惧是产后抑郁症的症状，随着时间的流逝，我又回到了非常像我自己的感觉。 疯狂一点，冒险一点，但对世界一点也不害怕。

However it was almost as if I had taken all that random fear and directed it at one object that I could actually quite easily avoid – planes. I wouldn’t fly out to America to see my family because I was scared of planes. I wouldn’t consider a holiday anywhere that involved a flight, because I was scared of planes. As my career in the web progressed and I was asked to speak at conferences I would turn them down because I was scared of planes.

但是，几乎就像我承担了所有随机恐惧一样，将其指向一个我实际上很容易避免的物体–飞机。 我不会去美国看我的家人，因为我害怕飞机。 我不会在涉及飞行的任何地方度假，因为我害怕飞机。 随着我在网络上的职业发展，我被要求在会议上发言，我会拒绝他们，因为我害怕飞机。

The more I told people I was scared of planes, the more I thought of it, the more I defined myself as a person who would not go on a plane. For 18 years I managed to avoid going on planes.

我越是告诉别人我不喜欢飞机，就越会想起，我将自己定义为不会登机的人​​。 18年来，我设法避免上飞机。

Then something changed. I think it started to change when I managed to deal with one of my other fears, that of public speaking. I’ve written here before about how I read Richard Carlson’s Stop Thinking, Start Living and one short section really changed how I saw fear. The idea that being afraid is a choice we make had been hugely important in me making a decision not to be afraid of public speaking.

然后发生了变化。 当我设法应对我的另一种恐惧，即公开演讲的恐惧时，我认为情况开始改变。 我之前在这里写过有关如何阅读Richard Carlson的《 停止思考，开始生活》的文章 ，其中有一小段确实改变了我对恐惧的理解。 恐惧是我们做出的选择，这一想法对我做出不惧怕公开演讲的决定非常重要。

I was really enjoying speaking at events in the UK, however I knew that my fear of planes was stopping me going further afield. My fear was stopping me doing things that I knew I would enjoy and I couldn’t pretend to myself any longer that I didn’t want to go anywhere anyway.

我真的很喜欢在英国的活动上发言，但是我知道我对飞机的恐惧使我无法继续前进。 我的恐惧使我无法做自己知道会喜欢的事情，而且我再也不能假装自己不想去任何地方。

With the knowledge that I had managed to conquer one fear simply by deciding not to be afraid, I decided to try the same technique on this huge fear. When I was asked to speak in Poland in April this year I said yes. I stopped telling people I was afraid of planes. I made an effort not to define myself as this person who was terrified of planes. By the time it came to the flight, I was nervous but I wasn’t afraid that I was going to be that person screaming “I want off” at the stewardesses. I was absolutely sure that I was going to be able to get on the plane and be fine. I was not scared of planes.

知道我只是通过决定不害怕来征服了一个恐惧，因此我决定对这种巨大的恐惧尝试相同的技术。 当我被要求今年四月在波兰讲话时，我说是的。 我不再告诉别人我害怕飞机。 我努力不将自己定义为这个被飞机吓坏的人。 到飞机上的时候，我已经很紧张了，但我并不害怕我会成为那个在空中小姐大喊“我要离开”的人。 我绝对确定自己将能够上飞机并且没事。 我不怕飞机。

I got onto the plane and the squeakiest aircraft I have encountered started very slowly doing a little tour of Heathrow, for 40 minutes or so. Squeak, squeak, squeak. I’ve been on several flights since this year and none of them have been as squeaky, or done such a lengthy taxi before take off as this one. I spent the whole time just reminding myself this was fine. I was not scared of planes. I did not need to worry that I couldn’t understand the Polish announcements because the plane was full of Polish people who all looked very relaxed, so all must be well. We took off. It was amazing.

我登上飞机，遇到的最吱吱作响的飞机开始非常缓慢地进行了希思罗机场的一段短途旅行，持续了大约40分钟。 吱，吱，吱。 自今年以来，我已经进行了几次飞行，但没有一个像以前那样吱吱作响，或者像在这样的飞机上起飞之前，打了这么长的出租车。 我花了整整时间来提醒自己，这很好。 我不怕飞机。 我不必担心我不会理解波兰的公告，因为飞机上到处都是波兰人，他们看上去都很放松，所以一切一定都很好。 我们起飞了。 这是惊人的。

On the way back from Poland we flew into Heathrow over Windsor Castle, and then I cried. I cried because living just down the road from Heathrow I saw the planes fly in over Windsor and I always thought it would be lovely to see the castle from the air, but I couldn’t as I was afraid of planes. As we came through the clouds and there was Windsor below me, it just felt like a little reward.

在从波兰回来的路上，我们飞过希思罗机场，在温莎城堡上，然后我哭了。 我之所以哭泣，是因为住在希思罗机场的那条路旁，我看见飞机飞过温莎，我一直认为从空中看这座城堡真是太好了，但是我却因为害怕飞机而不能。 当我们穿过云层，在我身下是温莎的时候，感觉就像是一点点收获。

I’ve been on 14 planes to 7 different cities since that flight to Poland in April. I like flying. Airports haven’t started to annoy me yet and I’m looking forward to my upcoming trip to Canada.

自从四月份飞往波兰以来，我已经乘坐14架飞机飞往7个不同的城市。 我喜欢飞行。 机场尚未开始使我烦恼，我期待着即将来临的加拿大之旅。

I tell this story because I was seriously terrified, and I know lots of people share the same fears. Not much more than a year ago I would have told you that I had no intention of getting on a plane ever. I was too scared. Yet just by making an effort to change my thinking I’ve been able to totally turn that around to a point where I actually enjoy flying. I don’t know how the brain works, I don’t know why this worked, however perhaps it it something to try.

我讲这个故事是因为我非常害怕，而且我知道很多人也有同样的恐惧。 不多于一年前，我会告诉您，我从未打算登机。 我太害怕了 但是，只要努力改变我的想法，我就可以将其完全扭转到我真正喜欢飞行的地步。 我不知道大脑是如何工作的，我也不知道它为什么工作，但是也许可以尝试一下。

Next for me? I’m intending to enter some triathlons next year as I am definitely not at all afraid of open water swimming!

接下来给我吗？ 我打算明年参加一些铁人三项比赛，因为我绝对不惧怕公开水域游泳！

翻译自: https://rachelandrew.co.uk/archives/2012/12/31/on-fear-and-deciding-not-to-be-afraid/

让你不在害怕指针